A few years ago, a few seemingly normal everyday events came together and taught me one of the most valuable lessons that I've ever learned.

My mindset at the beginning of this story was one of dissatisfaction and discontentment. Frankly, I was jealous of anyone who appeared to live in a nice home, drive a nice car, or take great vacations. I was embarrassed by my very tiny home and it's lack of fancy or up to date furnishings. I was embarrassed by the car I drove, the fact that when my family bought new clothes it was out of necessity not because styles or seasons changed. I was embarrassed by just about everything in my life!

My husband and I have both held jobs since we were teenagers. My husband has built his own business, which makes decent money, from scratch. I had put several years into building a career in a county government office, and had worked my way up to being a supervisor. We bought our home. And we have three beautiful children.....................Yet all I could see was that we weren't keeping up with the people that I deemed successful.

Due to my husbands business, my career, and having three active kids, our social life was for the most part non-existent. So, my husband and I joined a study group that involved meeting at different members homes each month.

We nervously started off to our first meeting at one of the homes and the minute we pulled in the driveway we looked at each other and said, "These people are never coming to our house!" This house was gorgeous, a huge brick colonial with a beautifully landscaped yard. Of course there were a couple brand new cars in the driveway, and the inside looked like you had walked into the pages of Better Homes and Gardens.

I also need to mention that this house belonged to some very wonderful people! They were gracious hosts and have become friends. The feelings of inferiority were all one sided - ours!

Because our hosts were such wonderful people and we enjoyed the group so much we decided to continue with the group. But we immediately took our name off the list of places to host meetings, stating that we just didn't have the room, and hoping that no one would think too much about it.

The same scenario of going to a new home each month and feeling like we just didn't measure up continued for several months.

We also had formed several relationships with some of my co-workers and several business associates of my husband's. Yes, these folks all appeared to me, to be more successful than we were.

Then a strange thing happened. As relationships developed with these "successful" people they began to share their lives with us.

One man had an incredible money making job, but it required him to travel constantly and his wife felt like a single mom, his children felt like they didn't have a father, and they were all miserable.

Another couple had an exceptionally mean in-law living with them that was the source of constant arguments. Their son had made some really bad decisions, and was now facing jail time. And I don't know if it was to pay for all of the things they had acquired or to try to stay away from all of the problems, but he worked two jobs and she worked three!

Yet another couple went through a particularly nasty divorce both stating that they'd been unhappy for years.

The list of really unhappy "successful" people grew and grew.

I'm not sure what it was that made the light bulb go on, but I began to feel sympathetic towards instead of jealous of these people.

I started to re-evaluate my life. I started to see that I had more than any of the "successful" people that I used to be so envious of!

I began to realize that that even though my house was tiny and my furnishing weren't new or fancy...It's a home full of love instead of a house full of things...and nothing could make me more proud! The fact that my car wasn't brand new seemed to matter less when I realized that it would cost time away from my family to pay for it! It also dawned on me that what makes a vacation great isn't going to some special well-known resort. It's enjoying where you're at, what you're doing, and the people you are with!

Wow! I was the richest person I knew!

I'm not for one second saying that I turned into a saint and wouldn't love a house with more room or a car that still was under warranty, or even that I wouldn't like to go on a second honeymoon someday.

But I did learn to redefine the meaning of success! Success is being happy! It's not defined by how much money you make or how much stuff you've acquired!

I determined right then and there that if it costs me too much time away from the people and things in my life that are important to me, it's simply not worth the cost!

At that particular time in our lives we were sacrificing everything that was important to us, all in the pursuit of what we thought success was. And it was about to get worse! My husband was about to start working ridiculous hours and I was increasingly taking on more responsibilities at work which meant that my kids were growing up without me and my husband might as well have been single (a true sign that I was becoming more successful - I thought!)

I truly thank God that he opened our eyes to true success!

We both turned down the extra hours away from home. Due to some other life changing events, I had a few months to be able to study, learn, grow, and decide what exactly success is to me, and I ultimately decided to quit my job and start a home business of my own!

I really believe that "the grass is always greener on the other side." When we got a real look at what we thought success was, we were very happy to be on our own side of the fence.

An even bigger surprise was that when my definition of success changed and I started concentrating on what's truly important to me, everything else changed!

I found that creating and running my own business has opened so many new doors! Now I am able to acquire the things that I used to believe were so important, only now I can really enjoy them, because now the important parts of my life are in order, and I 'm truly rich.... before you ever look at my bank account!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Stephanie Kelly provides real and honest information about creating, owning, and marketing home businesses at
http://www.saksbbi.com/ Enjoy fresh new ideas, inspiration, and motivation with her bi-monthly newsletter
Life By Design.